Realisation, Shrouds of Cloud, and More Figuring Things Out..

So anyway, although i am a little pacified now, the one thing that is unquestionably true is that i was stupid. I mean seriously...i don't know why i didn't see it before. Could it be that i was just young? Or just cunningly blinded?

I can't help but beat myself up over it even though i was told that i was being too hard on myself. But seriously...???

*sigh*!!!

Oh well...tough shit i guess.

Anyways, on another note, my "writer's block" is gone now haha (i know 2 people who would laugh at this :)). It's great to be blogging again even if i talk shit half (if not all!!) the time.

So peeps, it's great to be back!!!

For the moment....

I am in I SO LA TION

Luggage Laden

Something made me think about people and the emotional baggage they carry with them. You know how people say you shouldn’t enter into a relationship if you’ve carrying this burdensome luggage with you? Why is it that we never hear anything about what to do when you realise you’ve got a baggage after being really and truly in a relationship?

*sigh*

I think I’m there…the latter bit I mean. It’s weird how I was “fine”, “fine” and always “fine” and something happened yesterday that made me stop and think. It probably wasn’t the incident per se; rather how I reacted to it, what made me question it, the questions I asked myself..even the fact that I stopped while all these things were going through my mind is an indication enough…I’m a baggage lady.

So what do I do now? Part of me is absolutely adamant that I will not be humiliated as I was. That part now has “skeptic” written all over it. That part refuses to be the naïve person I once was, has hardened a little and will not believe in believing.

Why do I get the impression I’m suddenly faced with new demons to battle? And why is it I feel like I’m waayyy too tired to start fighting again..? When you do something for the good of something else, will you really be able to tell at the end of it what was it you were fighting for?

Or is that just the loss of rose-tinted glass talking?

I don’t know, maybe I’m just bored and tired of dealing with the same thing over and over.

Maybe I wish the next phase will come soon.