Moan, Complain, Whinge and Whine...

I've just had one of the most difficult days at work (please note the subject of this blog so that's all you're gonna get). For one thing, i am the sole person responsible for the system (now we've including the system for Secretaries as well, which we are the sole custodian for), whereas before this, there were always 2 people responsible for it.

And to be honest, it's driving me absolutely insane. It's probably ok if it's the only thing in my job scope but obviously it's not. Not only am i not from an IT background but i now have to deal with our outsourced IT provider and the team consists of a bunch of people who can hardly speak a word of english (their technical competency seem to leave a lot to be desired as well).

So this morning i had the luxury of some pity-me time and sat in the bathroom and cried. Saying that though, i felt a lot better after although for the rest of the day i felt like any little thing could've set me off if i let it.

And you know, i know everyone's feeling the stress and the pressure and i'm no exception but you know sometimes, i just wish things weren't soooo stressful...

I know it's ok and most of the time we just get on with it so i guess all i'm doing really is what the title says...*sigh*....

We're having a unit meeting next week to discuss our work for the year and i'm planning to propose that someone from the unit take this up as well. I really can't do it on my own...not if i'm planning to meet my other objectives as well.

This will kill me and i hate looking like an incompetent idiot. And this is where the root of the problem lies...maybe some of us set too high an expectation on ourselves that even we can't achieve. Maybe the stress we're feeling is not imposed by anyone but us...

And i think letting yourself down is probably the worst feeling...

Ultimately if you let someone else down, you're actually letting yourself down right? You feel guilty/ashamed (whatever) about disappointing that other person but you feel more angry at yourself for doing it...right??

Whatever, whatever, ramblings late at night. I'm done now, feel much better :). Have a great weekend peeps!